Through her Mother's Eyes
by MelodiousMoon
Summary: Gretchen Janeway recalls the events that have taken place through her eldest daughter's life, as well as how she felt. J/7
1. Raising Kathryn

A year after Edward and I got married I kept waking up sick as a dog. Edward thought it was a stomach bug, but, I had a feeling there was something else going on. When we went to the doctor, he told us we were expecting a baby girl who would be born sometime in May. I suppose I had mother's instinct from the very beginning. Both Edward and I were overjoyed. I always imagined being a mother. The prospect of having a little girl was so exciting, but at times nerve-wracking as all hell. On May 20th our little Kathryn Elizabeth came into the world. My baby was so beautiful. She had my auburn/brown hair and her father's blue eyes. I couldn't stop staring at this little creature my husband, and I quickly became the center of my world. I adored that precious little girl so very much, even more, than I loved myself. Two weeks later, Edward received his first commission as Captain. Starfleet informed him that this mission would be approximately three-months long. It pained both of us for him to leave but, I knew that was the price I paid for marrying a Starfleet officer. The day Edward went, I sat in a rocking chair feeding baby Kathryn. I began to wonder if these long missions would become a regular occurrence. I worried that my husband would get hurt or god forbid killed. I was terrified by the thought of having to raise Kathryn alone.

o-o-o

Kathryn was very mature for her age. Like her father, she was inquisitive about the world around her. Katie had a passion for Science. Sometimes she would resent me for forcing her to live a traditional lifestyle. My Katie was a daddy's girl. Her primary objective in everything she did revolve around her father and making him proud. Unfortunately, Starfleet took her Daddy away many times. He missed many of her birthday parties, tennis matches, and even her Junior High Graduation. Every time I asked my daughter if everything was okay, she would smile and assured me that she understood that Starfleet needed daddy more. Late at night, I would find her crying in the bathroom. It broke my heart.


	2. Katie is Growing Up

Then the Academy days came around. Now that was a very hectic time in the Janeway household. When Kathryn told me she was going to attend Starfleet Academy, I admit I was not thrilled, but there was no changing my daughter's mind. She was an exceptional student. One of the most talented and intelligent people in her class. Katie came home every weekend. However, there was one weekend that I will always remember. It was a beautiful Sunday morning, Katie and I were sitting on the porch enjoying a cup of coffee. I noticed she was quiet, too quiet. So I asked her if everything was okay. I saw a flush spreading from her neck to her cheeks. She said, "Mommy I need to talk to you." By the look on her face, I was sure she was pregnant. So naturally, I asked her. She gave me this funny look, so I figured the answer was no. I told her she could talk to me about anything and how much I loved her. Katie proceeded to tell me about her boyfriend Justin, he was a fine boy and treated my daughter very well, and for that I was grateful. I was not expecting what she said next. My baby, to me anyway, said: " I think I want to have sex with Justin, but I'm afraid." My little girl looked so vulnerable. That was the first time I ever saw Kathryn so uncertain. I asked her why and she told me other girls at the academy said it hurt. I told her at; first, there may be a little bit of pain, but it may not even be noticeable. She then began to ask me rather personal questions like did it hurt my first time, was it as pleasurable as people claim, did I have any regrets, so on and so forth. I answered these questions as honestly as I could without overstepping boundaries. Lastly I told her everybody's sexual experience is different and at first, it may be awkward. My daughter looked very relieved, but this conversation made me realize how much she had following week, Kathryn and Justin both came to spend the weekend. My goodness, my Katie was glowing. It was a glow that came with being in love. That evening was a fascinating one. Let's just say, Katie was no longer afraid, and I had to come to terms with the fact that my baby was growing up.

o-o-o

When Justin proposed, I don't think I've ever seen Katie smile so much. I was elated! I was looking forward to seeing what their married life would bring. Edward was a bit hesitant since the two were so young and Kathryn just graduated from the Academy but, I told him to let Katie and Justin live their lives, and if it were a mistake, then they would have to learn that for themselves. To say I was excited to plan my daughter's wedding would be an understatement. I envisioned a big farm wedding. Katie liked the location. However, she and Justin wanted it to be an intimate affair. I envisioned Katie wearing a big beautiful white wedding dress. As Phoebe would say "Ma you're delusional," and in this instance Phoebe was right. When Katie tried on her first dress, I began crying. She was indeed growing up. The dress she chose was beyond stunning. The future was looking bright for the future Mr. and Mrs. Justin Tighe. That was, until the accident.


End file.
